What should I say about Momma Zen? I don’t often like to read “mom” books. Just looking at them makes me feel like once I gave birth I stopped being me and started A’s mom. Being my son’s mother is a wonder everyday and I would give up everything if things came down to it, but I haven’t become a whole new person just because I’m a parent. I’ve change for sure. But adding another facet to my personality isn’t the same as a personality transplant.
I liked Karen Maezen Miller’s book. To all parents–actual, potential, and otherwise–I’d recommend it. I love where she talks about the unread parenting books (mine are dusty too) and it made me feel better about not obsessing over my son’s every developmental step. I have no idea if the art my son makes is developmentally appropriate. I only know I am amazed by his imagination and tons of his work decorate our walls.
Zen does not naturally attract me. I like some bits and not others, but I like how she reminds us to let go of rigid thinking and give yourself to your experience. She doesn’t really say anything I don’t on some level know–that doesn’t mean I don’t need to hear somebody else say it too.
Of course, I’m jealous too. As I rack up agent rejections, it is difficult to have someone who is published suggest perhaps I could let that obsession go. Publication won’t solve my problems or be the magic cure for all that ails me, but I can’t find a way to be zen about it. Sometimes with the whole Zen Buddhist philosophy I can’t decide what is acceptance and what is giving up.