I wonder when I will spend time just hanging out with friends. The writing/art-making life gets in the way. How understanding are your friends if you don’t see them because you have to write?
Let’s Do Lunch
I wonder when I will spend time just hanging out with friends. The writing/art-making life gets in the way. How understanding are your friends if you don’t see them because you have to write?
Marta Pelrine-Bacon 
All my friends are Internet friends. No exaggeration. The couple of IRL friends I have don’t live close enough to do much but talk on the phone anyway, so they don’t miss me. It’s an idea situation in that light.
I’m a sad, pathetic person, aren’t I? I’ve said too much….
I can’t imagine that you are sad and pathetic. You have a great wife and kids after all, right? If you say you are sad and pathetic, you are insulting your wife! I’m kind of kidding and kind of not on that too.
But with fewer friends, you can write more.
All my IRL life friends are long distance so those relationships are done through email and phone calls. But if I did have a friend who was a writer, I don’t think I’d sweat it. I’d know they’d come out of their cave sooner or later.
Being married to a writer, well now, that’s a whole other thing, because I can SEE him writing and I know not to bug him with irrelevant stuff or try to make idle chit chat. I just wait for him to finish. No big. 🙂
Well, how much time do you see him writing? And do you ever think it is too much? Like, do you ever think–now is not the time to be writing, buster. Get over here and be with your family!
He hasn’t spent enough time writing lately! Part of that is because my computer died so we have to share his now.
His writing hasn’t ever been a problem, probably because he’s here with us and he takes breaks when he does write so we never feel neglected or anything like that. If he was hiding himself away in another place, like a garage or something, then it might be a problem. Plus, he often asks me to help him with editing, so he practically makes it feel like a joint effort. 🙂
Oy. A question which — to answer fully — I could never deal with in a blog comment.
I’ll just say this: the writing schedule is pretty much nailed in place on the calendar. Because I write in the wee hours of the morning, I guess someone could say Cool — so your evenings are free! But that’s not so. I have to go to bed early, early enough that I have only 3 hours or so after getting home from work for eating, doing stuff with the dog, maybe crashing for a bit in front of the TV, and getting ready for work the next day.
Doesn’t allow for much of a social life. Thus, I’ve not made many friends outside of work hours since moving here (800ish miles from the friends and family I grew up with) 16+ years ago. And thus, I’m not hurting relationships with them.
After what Darc said, I’m sensing a pattern… 🙂
Yes, I am seeing a pattern too.
And I certainly have found it hard to make new, great friends. I don’t put the time in.
I fit into that pattern perfectly. I have no RL friends, except for one new one who doesn’t have established expectations for frequency of visiting. It’s not the writing that caused me to lose my friends, though. I’ve always been a loner.
Definitely a pattern!