Dogs are the best. They like to play. They like you. They don’t judge. They don’t go on the Internet and pour rage fuel on anything. Sure, they might rip the guts out of your pillows, but not because of your politics or religion, but because they’re fairly certain a squirrel is hiding inside.

We have three dogs, and they do their best to protect us from the squirrel hordes. They are fearless. Well, except for the one who is afraid of black holes. But he’s little and black holes are scary.

Anyway, I needed to talk about dogs because dogs make me happy. Have you seen the new film White God?

I’m fascinated by this trailer, but there’s no way I’m watching this film. I am a wimp. I don’t want to see dogs abused or dogs fighting. Nope. Nope. Nope.

Films with dogs in distress should be avoided. Old Yeller may have scarred me for life. When my son was nine, he saw a film where an orphan boy’s dog was shot. My son hugged our dog and cried. “The dog was all that boy had!” and “We have to keep our dog safe!” my son wailed. Trauma all around.

So, no dogs-in-distress movies for us. How about you?