I made a few teeny-tiny changes to the chapter over there. Just a few. But now I’m really going to put it away for a while. Really.
I made a few teeny-tiny changes to the chapter over there. Just a few. But now I’m really going to put it away for a while. Really.
Marta Bacon 
Well, I read it again and I still like it. 🙂
My only suggestion is that perhaps the chapter ends too neatly. You have tension in the car, a good indication that more conflict – and those lies we all want to know about – are ahead, and the car ride will bring us to the action – all good stuff for the reader – but perhaps a little more mystery and less description about the Red Moon. ??
Of course, I want the details of all that happens at the Red Moon, but make me beg and wait for it.
Just a thought. I like the feeling of going down the highway with all THIS STUFF going on under the surface in the car. Quite a bit a baggage in that car, I suspect.
It’s fun, by the way, to look at your chapter.